I’ve only ever had one problem:
Not recognizing that I am okay (and that I have always been okay and always will be okay). That’s what makes something a problem.
Which means I only have one solution to any problem: recognizing that I am always okay.
I may find myself in a situation where I’m suffering, but if I am suffering, it’s the suffering that’s the problem, not the situation.
It’s the suffering I’m trying to correct. It’s the suffering I’m trying to stop. It’s the suffering I’m trying to make sure doesn’t happen or never happens again.
I may think it’s the situation that needs correction, but the situation is neither here nor there because every situation is neutral. The situation is anything and everything depending on my perspective. The situation has no meaning at all until I give it one with my story. And when I write a story of not being okay in this situation, I suffer.
So if I think I’m not okay, THAT is the problem. If I’m focused on the situation and not on knowing I am okay in the situation, I am distracted from the root of my problem. That’s why all my attempts to solve my suffering by affecting situations end in continued suffering (and almost always leave me with new problems). Because I’m not addressing my actual problem, which is that I don’t think I’m okay. It’s why addicts continue to use: trying to manipulate the situation in order to be okay and not realizing that okayness only - and always - comes from within.
It never works to try to manipulate the situation.
Because the problem isn’t in the situation. It’s in thinking I’m not okay in the situation. Which is always false. 100% of the time.
When I manipulate situations in an attempt to be okay, I’m just shifting my not-okay-ness from one context to another. I’m changing the drapes and hoping the view changes, not realizing that a new view requires that I move MYSELF.
If I don’t think I’m okay, ego will always find a situation to blame it on. If it’s not this situation, it’ll be that situation, as hard as I may try to deny it or distract myself from it through situation manipulation.
If I recognize that I am always okay, ego will not be able to find a situation where I’m not okay, as hard as I may try to find one.
This is the only way to actually solve a problem. And it solves EVERY problem. Because thinking I’m not okay is the only problem I’ve ever had, the only problem I have right now and the only problem I ever will have.
I can learn to be okay - no matter the situation, by honestly questioning every stressful thought, every thought that I am not okay, by getting quiet, dropping my story for a moment, opening my mind and going in search of the TRUTH. Whose truth? Mine and no one else’s. When I can do that (and it ain’t easy - guides can be helpful), I find that the truth is ...
I am always okay.
Always.
When I recognize that, every problem falls away.
Then I think, “Alright, that’s fine for me, but what about all the other problems in the world, all the problems affecting others? The world is a mess!”
Okay…
If I am okay in a situation, it is not a problem for me. If it is not a problem for me, I’m able to see what needs solving and how to solve it: recognize that I am okay. When I am okay, when my problem is cleared up, every difficult thing in my life stops being a problem and becomes another way to move lovingly in the world.
What situation will I not be better equipped to meet with love when I recognize that I am perfectly okay? Who will I not be empowered to talk to? Who will I not be able to sit with? What will I not be able to see? Who will I not be able to hear? Where will I not be able to go? What will I not be able to risk? What will I not be able to endure?
There’s a clear order of operations: first come to a stable recognition of the fact that I’m okay, then go fix the world.